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Issue 18
A Culture Of Secrecy, Deception And Lies
Cites - An Animal Dealer's Charter?
Pet Cloning - Cruel To Animals And Humans
Whatever Happened To Oscar?
Urgent Appeal
Book Review : Animal Rights In South Africa
Vioxx Suit Faults Animal Tests
Half Of All Birth Defects Missed By Animal Tests
Science Cafe
Hall of Fame
Top Quotes

The Science Cafe

   "Oh, for Heaven's sake," thundered the Erudite Owl, "I cannot allow this cacophony. There must be order! And please address the chairperson and not each other. Remember, the Science Caf? was established here at Roodeplaat in the Interests of Better Science. Kindly raise a wing in order to speak. The subject currently under discussion is baboons being considered bio-hazardous waste and incinerated, because they defecated."
   The Canary raised her wing.
   "What does hazardous mean?"
   "Bio-hazardous denotes an entity which is a threat to life, and is usually incinerated," sighed the Erudite Owl.
   "Does that mean Nature Conservation and the SPCA should be incinerated?" hesitated the Sparrow.
  "Well, they said they gave it a lot of thought," said the Vulture, "they first drew mind maps, the latest method for brain storming."
   "But some people have no minds," chattered the Canary, "and others have no minds of their own."
   "Definitely not from the top end of the gene pool," responded the Erudite Owl.
   "And now Woolworths has drawn up its own list of compassionate products,"
said the Little Bird who had flown in, "and Eskort is on it, so at least they have a mind of their own. I mean that proves woollie thinking."
  "Will that save their bacon?" asked the Vulture.
  "Well, they'll only be stocking the up market smoked variety and that should push up sales," said the Little Bird.
  "Will that cause a smoke screen?" hesitated the Sparrow.


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